Having a meaning/goal/purpose in life again.

December 22
To be exact, December 22, 2012
This was the date that started a whole chain of events.
If you had read all the previous posts, you know what I mean.

Not all things were good, health-wise
But in some way, I also see this date as the start of something else.
Something I did not know or could see or think about, at that time.

I think it was end 2013 or mid-2014, my wife started to go to a Filipino Christian church.
I just dropped her off and after the service, she would just call me and I would pick her up again.
Because at that time, I had problems with large groups.
Too many people around me and I felt very uncomfortable.

After several months of doing this, I think this was mid-2014, she suddenly asked me if I would join her in church.
To be honest, I was already thinking about it myself.
Just to give it a try and see how it goes.
So the next Sunday we went together.
A bit strange and maybe uncomfortable because it had been a while since we had gone to a church service, together.

Everyone was very friendly and some of them I already knew so the uncomfortable part was a bit gone.
The service was nice and different then what I was used to or knew.
It was all in English, so no problem for me.
It was also a little bit different than a Catholic service.
But it was nice.

After a few times of joining the service, at one point there was something.
No idea what it was or why, but suddenly, I got more interested in it.
I had some contact through email and slowly on I got more and more interested.
And also started reading some parts/chapters and verses of the bible.

At one point, they asked me if maybe I was interested to help them with the multi-media during the service.
During the service, they would show the lyrics of the songs and also the preaching would be projected.
After observing it for a few times, I gave it a try.
Because of my reading problems, because of the hemianopia, it is not always easy to follow or keep an eye on the texts, to follow along, but slowly on, I started to learn or apply some tricks.
But at least this gave me a feeling of being involved in something again.

More involved.

A few months later, the men in the church started to ask me if maybe I also would be interested in joining the Men’s Ministry.
They would join every first Saturday of the month and would hold a discussion or bible study.
I was not really known that well with the content of the bible but was interested in joining them.
I liked it a lot and learned a lot from these discussions and studies.

Slowly on, more and more I got involved in doing something for or with the church.
I was getting the feeling again of being useful.
I did not feel like a “nothing”.
We even started a new bible study/care group in our place.
All in all, things went ok.

At one point, before the service started, it was announced, that soon there would be water baptism.
If anyone would be interested, they could talk to the pastor and you could be baptized.
That evening, my wife told me that she wanted to do this.
And to be very honest, after that announcement, I also was thinking about it.
So we took the step.

So in April 2015, we did the water baptism.
It was a very nice service and experience.
They called it “Born Again”.
The “old” you, you have left it behind and you are “born again”.

By now, I am still doing the multi-media.
The person(s) that did it before, they all left or have moved or too busy with school and studies.
So I am doing all by myself and I am enjoying it.
We also had joined a couples bible study group, near our place.
Every time I am still learning more and more.

I also started to watch some video’s on Youtube.
This because during one of our bible studies we were busy with a lesson from Pastor Rick Warren
He is a Pastor from a big Christian Church in the USA.
On Youtube, there are many video’s from him and his church sermons.
They are very nice to listen to and to watch.
Every time I watch them, I learn more and more.

I even started to read a bit more again.
Not just things from the bible, but also Christian books.
Maybe in a future post, I will tell more about these books and titles.

Right now, it is difficult to explain things.
But I think, everything that had happened, happened for a reason.
It brought me to where I am now.
Maybe it goes too deep but sometimes I am thinking, if all these problems with my health did not happen, I would not be doing what I am doing now.

Of course, I am sad that all those things had happened.

I am happy and thankful for the church and the people in the church.
It’s for or through them, I have a meaning/purpose/goal again.

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Addition

An extra addition to this “original” post.
I already joked to people around me, maybe we can just remove the month of December from the calendar.
You can read in this part, why.

What you should know about my posts.
Normally I will just write my thoughts in a draft post and over the next day’s I will review and revise it before I will post it.
So also with this post.
But this had got a little twist to it.

Just two days before writing this post, something happened.
I had to go out through our backdoor to get something from our garden.
It had rain almost the whole day.
Our terras maybe lays 30 to 40cm lower than our house, so we had placed a wooden step at the backdoor.
So I stepped out, on the wooden step and as I wanted to put my other feet outside, I slipped.

I lost my balance and fell backward on our doorframe, hitting my back/side on that doorframe.

It was painful and after laying on the couch for an hour, it was ok.
It was still painful but it was ok.
The next day, I called the doctor
Just to check if there was anything I need to do or look out for.

From what he had heard from me, it was ok.
Just keep an eye on it and if it gets worse or starts having trouble breathing, I should contact them again.
For two days things were ok.
Still painful but I could handle it.

On the third day, I was writing this post.
I finished it and left it so I could go over it in the coming days.
In the afternoon, I suddenly had to sneeze.
It felt like something snapped on that painful spot.

Not sure what it was, but suddenly it was like there was a needle or a knife on that spot.
I cried it out off pain.
I could not handle it anymore.
With great difficulty, I was able to lay down on the bed but every little movement was really painful.

After some time, I was able to get out of the bed and called the doctor.
According to the doctor, it sounds like I have 1 or 2 bruised ribs.
And there is nothing you can do about it.
It can take up to several weeks, for it to heal.
Until then, the only thing I can do is to take paracetamol, 2 tablets for max 4 times a day.
But it could take several days before it would help.

So for now, I have pain when I make a wrong move.
Or when I go to bed or getting out of the bed.

I am already taking so many different medications, for my health condition.
And extra painkillers are not good for me.
Only if the pain is still there after 7-10 days, I can use the paracetamol with codeine or they will subscribe codeine tablets, for the pain.

We will see how it goes, but I don’t have too much faith in using codeine.
The last time I used them, it did not help much.

It looks like, the month of December is not in favor of me.
Several of my “health” problems were in this month.
But maybe it is also a sign.
A sign to help us to remember the birth and suffering of Jesus.

May our Lord Jesus Christ place His healing power on all who are in pain and relief them from the pain and heal us.
Amen.

I hope you all will have a Merry Christmas and all the best wishes and blessings for the year 2020.